Again, this was written earlier in the year and I wasn’t sure whether to include it as it’s not the most cheery of posts but in that the point of this blog was for me to share how I feel about living with melanoma it seems wrong not to add it.
January 16th 2015:
It is the night before my nephew’s 18th birthday.
I was particularly blessed as I got to meet him when he was just a couple of hours old. He is the oldest of my fine selection of eight nephews and nieces but being the first he was the one who made me an auntie for the first time and to this day he still calls me Aunty Lucy. Like his delightful brothers he is an absolute treasure – everything you could want your boy to be and in that I have two little boys I look to him and his younger brother to see a glimpse of how my two might turn out. What I hate, is that I know that it’s so unlikely that I will get to see my beautiful boys see this particular milestone. So whilst I cannot wait to celebrate with my nephew tomorrow, tonight I am struck down with the bittersweet sadness that seems to rise up at every significant occasion. I cannot bear that I will not see either of my boys turn from boys to adults. I so desperately want to see how they will be. ..